Why you should not keep a lover guessing

Monday, December 9th, 2019 00:00 |
A sad couple. Photo/File

The topic that has been hitting headlines is the Building Bridges Initiative whose report was released at the Bomas of Kenya recently. The fanfare by which it was released has been the talk of the town.  

But one thing that was quite interesting about the event at Bomas was the way it brought together President Uhuru Kenyatta, deputy president William Ruto and former Prime Minister Raila Odinga.

The President and his Deputy showed such camaradarie in the last election campaigns that they looked inseparable.

But in the recent past the President has warmed up to his erstwhile enemy, the former Prime Minister. So seeing him sitting on the dais with Ruto on one side and Raila on the other side was quite something.

It was like a guy being invited with his new chick to an event where the host or organisers put them together on the same table with his ex. 

Now in politics, you can keep people guessing and jumping to conclusions like the President has done.

But in relationships, you can’t afford to do this. So many people move from one relationship to another without properly ending previous ones.

They let their “ex” think or feel they are still together while pursuing a new interest. They thus end up wasting the other person’s time while they would all along have come out clean that the relationship has ended.

Why do they do this? We fear hurting the other person’s feelings, thus postpone or procrastinate telling them the truth. 

What we fail to understand is that you can’t have your cake and eat it. You can’t keep two relationships running concurrently— your love interest would soon discover.

So, the best thing to do is to end one before you start the other. Now, ending relationships shouldn’t be that nasty— we can do it in a civil manner. Of course there will always be casualties.

But what we can try to do is minimise those casualties. It is better they hurt now than later when they discover that you have been cheating on them all along.

While you are at it, please don’t end a relationship by going silent or sending a text. Do it face to face.

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